Ludwig van Beethoven

This week, I had a chance to read two books about Ludwig van Beethoven; he is my favorite musician and composer. The titles of two books were “The Life and Works of Beethoven” and “The Letters of Beethoven.” The reason I read these books is because I am learning how to play Beethoven’s Sonatas. When I have piano lesson with my music teacher, he often said to me, “You must think the composer’s purpose of a piece of music and try to explain it with your own style.” Currently, I am learning Beethoven’s Sonata number 8, the first movement. This music was titled as “Pathetique” and it was French word that denoted a feeling of passion and sorrow in Ancient Greek. All three of this sonata’s movements are well-known since he published it in 1790. I also have heard lot through the media. But it is hard to play and make it as my own style. So I decided to look up several sources and understand the composer’s purpose. First I found that Beethoven wrote this music in 1789 and published one year later. What dragged him to write such spiritual music? The answer was in those two books I’ve read. When Beethoven was 27, his mother passed away because of illness and poverty. His father, Johann van Beethoven, was alcoholic and the drinking problem went out of control. So young Beethoven begins to work at the church as organist, where his father and grandfather worked, and earned half of his father’s salary to survive with his brothers. If I were in his shoes, I would probably become a hopeless person. But the genius musician wrote this sonata and expressed his moment of life through the music. His name and works are still valuable. As I was reading and searching about him, I felt that his skills and talents were not granted. To became a Beethoven he sacrificed himself.

Today's Violence in Our University

I still remember the Virginia Tech massacre in 2007. Cho Sung-Hui killed 32 people and committed suicide in his university. One of the video I watched in the youtube site recorded the shots of Cho’s bullet. It was recorded by someone who was at outside of the building with his camcorder. While I was watching, I could not imagine such dreadful situation was happened in the university. He was from South Korea, like me, but end up his life by making a dirtiest history in United States. So during my freshman semesters in Cameron University, I hoped this kind of violence should not happen again in any university. Two years and five months later, another crime has occurred in university. Last week Monday, I read an article about Annie Le in the New Your Times website. A graduate researcher, twenty four years old, Ms Le’s dead body was found at behind the basement wall in Amistad building, Yale University. I was really sad when I read about the fact that she planned to get marry in that week. She was a person who had a dream for her future life and that’s why she attended that university. But it is over now. On September 18, I found and read another article about Ms. Le’s death. The topic was about a murderer of Ms. Le. The authorities charged Yale University animal technician, Raymond Clark III, with murdering Annie Le. According to the article, he was arrested after 8A.M. on last Thursday in room 214 of the super 8 motel in Cromwell, Connecticut. I could not find any sources of the reasons why a technician murdered a researcher. I am pretty sure that each of these two people worked hard to achieve those competitive jobs. But today they end up their life miserably in their university. Two years ago, I hoped not to happen it again but it did. I am a junior in Cameron University now. I think university is where I can develop myself. But today, university is becoming one of the fields with serious violence. I still do not understand why these people decided such crimes in the university. In 2009 I hope no one make a stupidest decision again in any university.

i have a dream

This Friday, a member of our church congregation passed away after his long illness. When Mr. Kim closed his eyes his wife and son wailed so sadly. The word of death is so painful for us to accept it, especially to families and close relatives. But after the funeral worship on next Tuesday, Mrs. Kim has to overcome the pain of her husband’s death. Someday, I would also face this kind of situation and I might desperately want to overcome that pain quickly. How can we live when we lost our family member? We can still live our individual life by a dream. Mrs. Kim has to live rest of her life without Mr. Kim and his son, Jin, has to survive without his father. But from now on they have to focus on their own dreams or visions. This is one of way to overcome the pain and I think a vision is my hope to live my life. I have a big dream. Since I was 17, I wanted to become a medical missionary. For last five years, I was not sure whether I could go to medical school and walk into the mission field. But now, I have a faith and passion that I really want to be a medical missionary and reach out to poor nations. Every day I dream about my future, whether it would be fun or hard. Until I reach my goal I will keep studying and challenge myself. Because I want to develop myself as I approaches to my dream.

i love you mother

After our English class covered the topic of Mickey Mantle’s life I learned that I should express I love feelings to my family. We discussed that Mickey regrets the fact that he did not say how much he loved his father while his father was alive. So I learned if I do not say it then my family would never know and I will make a mistake like Mickey made. I decided to open my heart. Since my parent moved to San Francisco we often communicated by emails. When we were living together I did not noticed how important they were. But now I know their each positions were so valuable and greatly supports my life. To express my thoughts and feelings, this Tuesday I wrote an email to my mother. I could just call her and say that I love her but to be honest, I did not have a confidence to express my love while I was listening her voice. On email, first I explained to her who was Mickey Mantle and his relationship with his father. Then I told her what made me to say that I love her. After I send this email I felt lighter than before, as physically and mentally. Next day she wrote me back. The first sentence on her email grabbed my attention.
She said “Thank you my daughter.” When I read that sentence she touched my heart so softly. In last few months, I was very depressed and felt lonely for some reasons. Also I often cried in the dark because I missed my parent so much. But when I read her email, all those pains and tears were gone. All I did was saying “I love you and I love you so much.” My mother gave me a double of love that I offered to her. If I did not expressed my love then I would never receive this kind and love feelings from her. I wish someday that, when we are face to face, I tell her that I love her very much and thank her to give me a birth.